EP8: What do Testicles Taste like? Eating Tonsil Stones and Podcast Set Falls Apart Whilst Filming

Spreading Rumours by Kristen Hanby Episode 8. 

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Transcript

(00:00) another week another [ __ ] episode of spreading rumors you know what I'm saying we've got Johnny boy today Natalie and we've got Scotty boy eighth episode last pod we've done a couple shots and we were drunk well you were drunk Scotty I dropped Scotty home and you were sharing out the window it kind of mad [ __ ] bro he rang one of our mates like saying I'm gonna [ __ ] beat your ass yeah and doofo was like what the [ __ ] come with any little prick yeah so yeah we're gonna start this pod with
(00:24) a [ __ ] shot you know I'm saying to get it going and just to clarify we've just shot this part because we've done the whole shot Johnny just [ __ ] smashed the mics up Natalie got hit with a mic in the face so yeah shot number two don't move I'm John coretti happy Friday happy Friday happy spreading oh that was mate that one was warmer than the first one oh my God so yo if Natalie froze up or Johnny or Scotty froze up we've agreed it has to be sick on that table so we could all eat it with our hands oh I'm chasing
(00:57) you know what I'm saying oh are you oh that's a spit mate no they're sharing spit Scotty's hanging on for dear life over there look at him but he's doing his whim off some water I'm just letting you know I've planned a few segments in the podcast which I'm if it goes well and people want it it's going to be a new segment and there's um each whoever loses those segments has to do another shot so if you lose all the games you could end up and have a free shots in you so I could potentially
(01:31) be paralytic paralytic I'm guessing you again I'm guessing you're gonna order me car back then yeah now I'll give you a piggyback like you know what I'm saying because I'm on my diet at the moment you know I'm saying if you're watching this you've probably noticed that I'm [ __ ] looking sexy and you're looking good day five of my fast you know I was actually inspired by uh Ramadan as mad as it sounds I've seen how they do it bro if they can do their stuff I'm gonna do mine hardcore yeah
(01:55) I'm saying they they fast from the moment I think the Sun starts Rising yeah they're not allowed to drink water nothing food till the sun's down every day for 30 days bro it's part of the religion and I respect that [ __ ] you know what I'm saying so if they can do that you can do it but can they eat when the sun's down yeah I think I think they all have like come and get together like all friends and that's like a when the sun comes down they like but yeah that's why I'm doing it I'm not eating till 1pm
(02:18) and I've got to have my like food breakfast lunch and dinner in that space between one and six and after that I went to have dinner last night like 6 30 you realize the time didn't have dinner yeah I'm trying to be strict as [ __ ] man up here and did Two Shots yeah yeah it's in those shots I'm saying that's not bad but those sugar that's sometimes good for you it's like [ __ ] which warms you up yeah I'm saying [ __ ] warm my cheeks are warm what's that saying metabolism going they warm
(02:43) your cockles warm your cockles what's even where does it come from this is like an old school yeah like your mom says yeah sure that's one my cockle's up that's one Mac cockles I've worn a short shirt today because they get a little comment saying I [ __ ] my tattoosa yeah because I'm not gonna lie I've got like because when I'm bored what I do is I tend to just go and get tattoos I make it up on the sport well if I took my trouser shirt off and just covered in like tattoos I think they're fun I think
(03:09) it's cool yeah I look like a [ __ ] I'm this close I want to get a face tap but like I'm so pleased you can't do that I don't know what to get though like if I push it that would be the worst like but if I do it you can get you get a little oh no I just [ __ ] I remember back in there in L.
(03:25) A I was like me and Jackson I was gonna get handy gang when I do a little pumps it's crazy that would have been mental you've got all got me tax have you I got one in barley mate it's [ __ ] it's it's eroded yeah yeah it's well it's just it's just really like uh it's like a Fine Line Tattoo but he warned me it's gonna it's gonna wear off a tattoo but it was like it's called Like A Fine Line Tattoo it's not like shaded or anything you know what I mean so he said it's pretty much going to be
(03:56) you're gonna have to get it like updated every like six months okay done properly what's that mate would you not just get a redone properly I think you need to get it a bit more thicker and more shading and stuff for it to stay Yeah Yeah by the type of tattoo I've got but yeah you should have just yeah you should just get like if you've got to get a thick lines maybe mine's not like that yeah yours is well thin compared to mine look at the difference in thickness [ __ ] yeah yeah yeah it's just quite cool
(04:20) but the thing is they look cool when you know them gel press he's got those kind of vibe all over his body well I'm gonna I'm gonna like create a sleeve around this so it's just like yeah but it looks cool [ __ ] so if I blow it make a wish okay so there's kind of meanings behind your attack yeah yes what's the weirdest tattoo you got my armpits are quite funny Smiley what's weird ones I need to get my [ __ ] done imagine getting your [ __ ] done just color the whole kind of inline what
(04:52) would you have oh like like some spiders legs you know what I'm saying though it's like a spider coming out the hole it's just like four eight legs mate that's sick you've got hair on this it looks like a web yo comment on the video if I should get a spider coming at my [ __ ] tattooed on and then I'll [ __ ] get it out on that table yeah you know what I'm saying because this pod gets like one light because it's [ __ ] [ __ ] you know what I'm saying why are we even wasting our time let's shine
(05:20) everybody that I'm saying that to be fair though in eight weeks what nearly 5K on YouTube still get like 50k views of a pod a pod yeah so we're chilling man it's going well it's going well we're chilling but yeah so tell us about Panama you know I'm saying You must have some crazy stories uh panel is a good crack there's um you know you gotta tell us a story about you getting pulled over by the pulpo oh my God no man I'd love to know oh mate so we've uh so I've taken my medical cannabis with me over
(05:56) oh yeah I'm saying at least if you smoke before this year [ __ ] me like how much have you been smoking [Laughter] and mate you might as well [ __ ] whistle I told you to get me a [ __ ] yeah [Applause] at least look like you're having fun yeah okay now mate and I'm chilling I want to hear this so you took the medicine yes I've taken my medical over with me got it all the way to Panama from Jersey right and uh what are you laughing at I'm gonna do this but Alex can you hear him in his mic perfect okay keep talking
(06:42) laughing what you want me to do like give me the movement buy two shorts and I just found that really [ __ ] funny oh that's cool that's nice anyway let's tell us about your ideas I've taken it over with me it's got all the way to where we were going six hours um transfer down to pedesty stayed like got a high car next day and as we're leaving pedically going to uh the Desperado and the Narco please stay on their bikes doing checks so I pulled down my window bear in mind I had a joint before we left the Gaff yeah and uh all
(07:15) she said was license part of that didn't speak a word of English so I've got out the car I've gone to the back full of [ __ ] looking for my passport my driving license couldn't find it anywhere gone through my rucksack and it wasn't in there and then my pouch backy was in there next thing I got tap on the shoulder and he's gotten to me you watch me kind of thing so I'm watching him he's gone through my bag picked it up and he found the grinder in there next thing that's it all our bags are being
(07:38) searched and he keeps going mass mass I'm like nah back pain back pain oh oh back pain yeah and uh obviously not having a clue what I'm saying and uh like we're literally [ __ ] on the side of the road I'm sweating at the time I didn't mean like I'll get get to that in a minute yeah at the time I [ __ ] you know they're there with their guns serious like you know [ __ ] really yeah so um going through our staff nothing in my bag he's picked one of my mates sunglass cases pulled out the
(08:04) glasses and there was a bit of weed mate goes because he's like put straight at me your mate said it's his no no point at me but you'll make pointed yeah saying it's it's like it's yours it's mine so he the coppers picked up who's these glasses he like looked at us when and then he Daniel was like ease and then he found it in there and he's like snitch I smell a grass right and then you too you wouldn't do that to each other but I think the reason why I did that is because he knew I was in the
(08:31) medical and had a certificate yeah and obviously he did a snitch boy so he's gone through all our stuff and the only bag he didn't check was a circle bag which had my tub of maybe like between 12 and 15 grams in it and uh and anyway so I'm like still couldn't find my passport had no ID nothing I'm like [ __ ] panicking sweating like trying to like stay cool and literally fulfilled me I looked underneath the car I was like I wonder if it's fallen out got to the front of the car it was 10 foot in front
(08:56) of me my passport was just lying on the edge of the road driving license gone so I gave him my driving license anyway at the end of it I thought about blackmailing him yeah like giving him some money yeah good job I didn't so anyway I've just uh he's given it back to us and he's let us go after about 45 minutes gave me the weed back in the grinder why good you didn't blackmail him though no no no apparently the guy the guy who we met out there you can't blackmail blackmail the uh Narco police
(09:20) over there yeah um oh my God When Johnny whole face changes [Applause] just take my ass I was panicking even though I knew I got it from the chemist yeah but like one thing I didn't realize is I looked in it said yes like medical is legal in Panama and it was only when I got there met the guy who took us fishing who's English lived at the 12 years he was like yeah it's legal and uh tablet and oil form flour is illegal so I was lucky I'm not in a panel even though even though you've been prescribed over here yes they don't care
(09:58) yeah Tony's a [ __ ] what's it called where you take drugs I am an international drug Smuggler Johnny yeah yeah that's what I'm saying I've completed it I've completed it onto their noses so what you're pretty much saying is you've just conned the whole of the Panama police oh and you've you've just smuggled in with a couple of fishing after this but you don't want a man just confessed mate you've just gone there yeah you've said I've got a shitload of weed there there's only 10
(10:29) to 15 grand you've got a shitload of women prescribed by a doctor wait that we would last me in Scotty four years yeah you've gone out in the ocean you've fished all their fish pull it all up on Instagram and then said [ __ ] you guys I'm off basically with my wheeze did you [ __ ] any fish no no did you see any official fannies I caught a stingray oh that's why you're at the clinic as soon as you got back mate yeah that [ __ ] still takes weeks imagine yeah imagine we've seen on the news breaking
(11:06) news English man caught shagging fish in the canal yeah it's like Drone footage of him just oh remember that time mate you know I was just thinking of them remember that time when you moved house you were moving in I took a fat [ __ ] in your mouth no no what he done was there was no toilet roll and the toilet's been taken out so he'd cut some carpet off the carpet we had ripped up put the carpet in the bath taking a big fat [ __ ] in the bath and just rolled it up in the car I didn't even roll up no I literally laid it it
(11:37) was in the bath so so there's a [ __ ] a [ __ ] carpet even if it was someone took a fat [ __ ] in it mate less than a half an hour and I went what the what the [ __ ] is that everyone's saying oh man what the [ __ ] who [ __ ] their pants someone in the bathroom just seen a fat turd mate in the [ __ ] bar what was it a car for like me and you came back to the Gap hiding for like almost an hour or the camera set up in the kitchen I'm hiding in the conservatory it was fake though no no why did you smell the [ __ ] out you
(12:07) went down and you were like oh I think that's real that stinks he's like yeah if that's real that's real if that's fake that's a good fake poo like they're not real remember that gaffe as well I show me his magic trick like I've walked inside have you seen my magic trick I've walked into the kitchen yeah this there's he's on the floor no he's pulled his pants down and he's pissing and he's catching it and drinking it oh my God and I've got my camera record it next
(12:30) thing he's just sitting in a puddle of piss pissing on himself yeah you like that again pull your mouth you lie down yeah so you gave yourself a golden shower literally man I've done it loads that was [ __ ] but no that housemate back in the day so remember when um Johnny moved into what what year was that when they bought that house you know one down groover School that was the first one so yeah so Basics and listen to this anyway so I've taken a [ __ ] in the bath we've decided to move it so I've rolled up putting the
(12:55) neighbor's bin so I'd imagine that so that [ __ ] didn't you know they had a fat [ __ ] in that bin and that house as well Johnny was in the building site then wasn't I yeah because ages ago so I've ran I've made um so he's doing his kitchen he's ordered a brand new kitchen he's like can you come down and do it so I'm like Corsica [Music] and there's like a gap that big at the back of the worktop yeah so yeah to obviously buy a new one maybe so all you did was make cup of teasing your real
(13:25) job mate [ __ ] that was mad and the main companies and door handles no [ __ ] me kids he just didn't cut basically when he's when he put in he made up all the units which was fine and then he's fitted the units and he started with the worktop but the thing is he didn't cut the works up a square or the wool either the back of the wall wasn't Square so you cut it like I mean I'm just playing it down the [ __ ] I had to get Reuben here yeah Ruben's dad meet him good picture went off the build skin I think he said
(13:55) he'd give me 10 pounds an hour to go down and do some [ __ ] yeah so I was down there mate you just get the saw out of you that was 14 13 years ago yeah me I had the plane around and obviously I had this room and it broke my hands it's sore and I'm sweating because obviously I'm thinking oh [ __ ] this [ __ ] up already put the cabinets back that was mad though man no you said that it sounds I know like I hate the building site but you know what I do little jobs I actually like like trying to hang a door
(14:35) floor down tiles I used to love that [ __ ] yeah I'd actually be in my zone doing it but it's when they used to make me [ __ ] dig holes and fill buckets up with [ __ ] and wheelbarrows and put my back out every time we went down the dump I just have to end to the trailer with uh rubbish every time about fail do that back when you do that a lot when you lock your back because you can't walk and you can't walk you don't play it's three days every time I do it I'd have to do that what are you talking
(14:59) about here my boss you with a job no they're my boss I can't even imagine you doing anything maybe just get a Tipper because it was [ __ ] me did you see the [ __ ] we had we used to have this trailer that we made ourselves out of plywood holes in it yeah mate and I was the [ __ ] that [ __ ] had to do that [ __ ] bro were you the only laborer pretty much on site you were the [ __ ] yeah well there was a few [ __ ] but like I was obviously younger [ __ ] so I was the one that had to do [ __ ] yeah yeah you know what I'm saying
(15:25) and then [ __ ] you know what it is like it's funny it's a tree lad you know I mean you're at the bottom of the pile there you know having to go get teas and [ __ ] yeah that was my favorite time of night I remember 20 minutes but you literally take we got teas mate cool I walked slowly down like five six minute walk go to the shop in there you know what I'm saying order the cheese waiters get made chin there comments a 20 minute break maybe don't get a tease so it's literally yeah best job you can get
(15:48) would you would you not offer teas like every hour just to get them no no there was a set times no no because we used to have we used to work pretty much the same places like this big crazy one like 60 gas in yeah yeah and it literally just down here would always be like ten to four but anyone got a tea I remember when you handed in your notice as well that was Matt I literally remember it like yesterday you telling me Oh I've handed in my notice and your boss was like actually quite sad that you were leaving
(16:11) yeah yeah but the thing is I went to work picture this I didn't even plan it that day so I've gone to work again I remember it was down um legit down there I was working there got in the kitchen for some reason like I'm saying I literally just done a little Snapchat deal got like 50 Quid and I was like [ __ ] it I'm quitting my job today I'm going to put my [ __ ] what's it called in what's it called your um notice notice in and I'm in there yeah and I'm like mate I've gone to tell my old boss
(16:40) like 10 times and I've not words out he was in the kitchen working and working the kitchen just couldn't get it out bro and literally he then it was about one o'clock he went to go on lunch and I went oh yeah by the way Renee like um I'm gonna take videos full time he's like what and he obviously didn't believe me at first and then like literally man like he you could tell he's a bit like a bit like oh [ __ ] because we used to have a crack man yeah yeah I'm saying at about four o'clock
(17:04) and we're got the teas came back he mentioned to all the boys I remember I was sat on there again tonight insulation you get lost the yellow stuff in a row but all sat on that having a cup of tea and he said and all the boys like what the [ __ ] two weeks mate two week notice it was crazy that's not I remember I came back and told my mom won my nan and they were like [ __ ] oh my mom's raging how the [ __ ] you gonna get me rent money my name was like you silly little prick you pissed your mom off now
(17:28) oh my God but you gotta understand though like obviously we've had them on the podcast and that they were at that point they wouldn't understand [ __ ] right what do you mean you've just quit your full-time job you're earning money to go do videos you wouldn't understand would you it's crazy because at the end of the day like obviously we do our [ __ ] yeah people obviously see us doing this but like everyone's we're just normal people yeah at the end of the day though we just literally don't follow this
(17:49) we've got followers but like we're just normal people yeah we don't think so that's what I'm saying so to them obviously you know people when they look up maybe like all people live in L.A they think content but then today our families are still normal you know what I'm saying yeah but they don't think we are yeah that's at all they should be [ __ ] weird but literally mate we literally should let them go down when we've [ __ ] got nothing we get down you know what I'm saying we still eat
(18:09) the same we still sometimes we're like I can't be [ __ ] awesome yeah I'm saying we're still people but people when you've got followers and you've got like like people think it's automatically you assume that you think you're like the higher like you're on the hierarchy or whatever but we literally don't they think you're like they look at us like superheroes are but we're not you know what I'm saying you gotta remember like they only see what you put online yeah
(18:28) yeah but that's it they just presume that we think we're like the [ __ ] dog's bullet yeah like I've seen a comment saying oh because I don't like it when people fart around me oh because your brother's all famous now you think you [ __ ] like you know you're up here no oh really do you know how many [ __ ] me it's a mean I'm [ __ ] think I'm something else I don't know how many people yeah I [ __ ] don't like people farting yeah it's crazy man I love it that's why let's mad as it sounds that's
(18:51) why I love it Johnny as long as they smell good I am the one of course anyway oh the mics come out oh [ __ ] sake Alex man naughty boy can you hear me yeah Fox thanks Johnny that's that's your oh that was you no yeah cause you're [ __ ] you're talking about me yeah I reckon you should have another shot that was your second good morning that's why do you know this pod that's why I like is Madison too because man like generally like you get obviously people that get lit guests on like don't run their pods are lit but
(19:38) they always see like they are looking cool they're trying to look cool lit but hey this is just for people normal people to watch turn off from their life for an hour maybe last tomorrow and just relax normal people you know what I'm saying yeah that's literally exactly what it is and just [ __ ] look at my stinky [ __ ] yeah wait think of [ __ ] yeah do you know like as mad as it sounds you should say finger [ __ ] the stinky [ __ ] my fingers think your ass okay this is always [ __ ] blow mine just a black
(20:02) hole do you know when you people are well there's been a black hole found in space yeah all right yeah [ __ ] is a black hole do you know what I'm saying it's obviously they find the black so it's like a hole bro you can go in yeah another dimension yeah picture like say if there's a hole in the Earth but if you went in there there's obviously something in this [ __ ] hole so if I don't think there is I think you just get [ __ ] sucked up to it Jack can you go to a different world an
(20:30) underground city can you go somewhere else I reckon there are [ __ ] other [ __ ] on other planets that we don't even know yeah but 100 you smell like the [ __ ] little ones I reckon shit's going on out there that we don't even know about over they've got Like Satellites they know what's going on there they know where the place when they take a picture of the [ __ ] Sky it's always like one pixel yeah you know what I'm saying we've got why do people believe in flat Earths like why are they
(20:55) faking it it's mental I think it's just like a group like it's like when people just like vegan it's going viral now about Pilots getting interviewed um yeah probably pilots who do flights and they say yeah the Earth's flag we've known for years it's mad isn't it yeah no and they're Pilots they fly around commit it's like yeah of course it's gonna be wise the world's moving then do you mean they're still yeah you've never visually looked at the Earth from above yourself to know
(21:19) obviously I don't believe it's flat but that's the way they see it you know what I'm saying and obviously when it's the saying is like why would anyone lie why are you lying about it when you go on the boat mate you never feel like you're curving it's weird isn't it yeah because gravity is yeah yeah that's right he's like a is a strong force like you wouldn't even know anyway [ __ ] What's this called what's this conversation called This is called Flat Earth yeah
(21:42) [ __ ] them I'm not about that I'm around excuse me I'm I'm a really really Flat Earth okay you should be abusing your ass oh Johnny's [ __ ] dude that's all part of the [ __ ] I didn't even move it don't blame me on this it's ain't my first morning you're gonna do that hold it that's Flat Earth is mate you're gonna have to just hold it ready you know what it is it's his weight pushing against that [ __ ] out weigh myself today 88 kilos Man 10 kilos wow we've got the same [ __ ] body [ __ ]
(22:27) where is it where are you this is [Laughter] once a week you [ __ ] glass at your [ __ ] yeah every once a week so after that [ __ ] happens it recovers for a week and every once a week that occurs yeah or every time you're out in public you just constantly get random cheap shots from human beings I'm still standing or once a week I'm gonna take the the glass out the ass only because sometimes when I've had to [ __ ] do Doogie because some of them are [ __ ] hurt coming out so I'll take the glass yeah once one time yeah
(23:26) every time no it's weird once a week yeah once a week no once a week you [ __ ] glass or every single day you're in public yeah once a week I'd rather [ __ ] glasses yeah okay I'll take the raised blade [ __ ] nah [ __ ] that way I'm just taking your body's gonna get used to it who's who's um who's taking these cheap shots any randomly men ladies it could be a granny or something every time every strength you're walking me you're just getting levered from yeah can I
(23:50) smack them back yeah I always dive into like the like what can I do though yeah I've always liked that yeah I'd love to smack a granny [Laughter] [Laughter] we're gonna have a cut and play for one
(24:55) minute and we're gonna redo the mics so yeah we'll give us one minute so yeah we're back technical difficulty the mics fell off the [ __ ] wall the Shelf came missing so we've had to kind of [ __ ] do our best okay so be [ __ ] grateful I actually like this yeah it's so much better this is so much so what we were saying we were talking about testicles tasting like chicken I'd say chicken what would you say it taste like um like like dried up really dry broccoli oh mate if you look at that wall you know
(25:36) what it tastes like if you look at that whiteboard you know what it tastes like if you look at a well if you look at a [ __ ] you know what it tastes if you it tastes like [ __ ] cheese cheesy fish my back is [ __ ] hurting that's the thing though isn't it like you could look at something even if you haven't like if you you think about licking it you know what it tastes like yeah no no no no no no no do you know what that's from smells is it smells differential if you look for the curtain I'll know what that will
(26:07) taste like yeah the first thing that thinks to my licking code and you get that dried it it's a paper in the mouth anything no yeah like if you were to lick that piece of foot you know you know what it's going to taste like a sponge like if I looked at hamby's top of the hamby's head I'd be like I know what are you going on this topic oh my God so we've been we said we said we weren't gonna mention my hair I wasn't gonna address it was that been half an hour maybe we had to I'm [ __ ] staring
(26:39) at the camera yo I've got bad intro not bad to choose before it's not intrusive 40 of the day but [ __ ] it go shave your head I went and shave my head because I thought [ __ ] it why not and you're intrusive thought today or me [ __ ] me a person yes I walk past that she's a nice one just stab her what where in the kitchen but I didn't stab her I don't know where where in the body stomach when I went past that I was like [ __ ] jabber with it I've just had a horrible horrible thought and I was like what he's like I
(27:03) already stab me for them scissors isn't it and he's like yeah do you know what I had this morning do I tonsil Stone oh I died poofings [ __ ] you get stuff in your tooth and it comes loose and you're like it's not in your tooth you take it you take it out and then it's like oh my god what the [ __ ] smells like dog [ __ ] oh it smelled I thought I just had something wrong with me same I only learned it two days ago so you told me I've been pushing this white thing in the back of my mouth
(27:36) out yeah and I've been getting it [ __ ] stinks of [ __ ] and you only learned it well so he used to tell Danielle and smell it and was like yeah I used to get it you're not fine did you ever I used to something to do it before I realize what it was when I do it and I was thinking but then you spit it and then you're like I don't know where that's gone I'm glad I'm not the only one someone's Barefoot they've walked in their house the nurse on their floor in their carpet [ __ ] someone Falls over drunk with
(28:02) their hand goes to [ __ ] wipe their mouth now they put their tons of stone in your mouth oh I think that's how they passed around that oh there's just one tonsil show in the world there's a king passed around holy [ __ ] okay what would you rather okay it's like a store listen carefully what would you rather every morning for breakfast you have to have a bowl of tonsil stones oh from 10 o'clock until 8 o'clock AM you have serious diarrhea every day diarrhea diarrhea diar [ __ ] real yeah I could
(28:33) diary at least I'd lose weight I'd be seven I'll be 70k so the whole time you're in bed for your bed ever every morning you've got to change your sheets clothes diarrhea don't you you just have a you just sleep in a big bucket but you know it's just live you don't you [ __ ] you keep [ __ ] yourself then you've got to change stuff if you're in a bucket you just take something lay down with the buck on your arm you get a big enough bucket you make your bed in a bucket and just wash it out
(29:01) every day because your tonsil stones have protein in maybe I don't know why are you thinking for oh yeah I'm thinking high protein milk it might have like it's got all sorts in it might have a bit of [ __ ] thought like what are you doing I'm gonna [ __ ] be the opposite I'm gonna have a fat bowl of [ __ ] tonsil stuff I breathe from my mouth I can't smell anyway I'm filling up with milk and just [ __ ] taking it again it's like cottage cheese have any of these ever eaten it like I just
(29:28) swallowed it oh no no no no or I might have done by accident because it's falling like oh my [ __ ] got it just swallow it down you ever [ __ ] gone to sniff and you sniff the comb next thing your [ __ ] eyes open it's growing at the top of your head like oh Mage you know we win [ __ ] um me and Alex um the camera guy and we went to we went to London like a week ago mate and the [ __ ] [ __ ] Master stood on the back of my shoe like six times for me so it's only me and him in London okay at what point are you
(29:59) walking behind someone every day to the point mate the sick time he done it my [ __ ] whole shoe came up fell off and I'm thinking but you're only gonna have second urgent I'm smacking this [ __ ] wait it's crazy man that's probably one of my boys that's my pet hair what's your thoughts on that is [ __ ] your pay yeah because if it constantly happens then they're not learning so you've got to turn around and slap the [ __ ] at him at one point I guess like one time's an accident yeah
(30:25) but there's just two of you why are you standing right behind me I reckon that close I reckon because Alex quite a scared boy he wants he wants to be close yeah you know prison break I didn't say that but why not he's staring at my flat back do you know what's [ __ ] as well I've seen a video the other day and I don't understand why these people do this mate do you know what [ __ ] that go diving in caves and try force himself can't give through and it's I've seen this guy mate I've seen this guy and
(31:06) he's in like and he me he's in these [ __ ] close spaces and it's like why are you in there mate and I'm like get the [ __ ] out of it you know what made me feel that he can't get through and turn around and he's saying to his feet behind him I'm stuck go on I'm stuck I can't get out what does he do then [ __ ] knows me no that's [ __ ] tries his best to get his hand down and jerk off one more time [Music] but he comes he he erodes the stones it makes way and then he's free like
(31:49) tonsil stones brother you're probably fine they're recording it on sets where they're not even stuck anywhere it's just they're climbing through these crammed like you know I've seen videos yeah I've seen videos of people like not not the actual video then but like people saying the amount of people they find dead just in caves imagine they're kind of dick in his hand that'd be you yeah it is literally mate okay I'm saying I think it's time to get it popping yeah it's time to get it
(32:24) popping I'm overheating here mate from the shots no my my cheese [ __ ] film yeah I feel like horses I thought I like Scotty too you might need a shot to call you down mate no so listen listen to the [ __ ] CEO oh hey guys guys Grandpa's talking you know what I'm saying wisdom you got a big vein going down here as well when that comes out now so listen Okay so for every pod now I've planned a couple segments so this one's this little ones let's get it popping okay so I'm gonna set this up okay so Natalie
(33:00) enjoying it you're gonna try their hardest to continue this pod you know what I'm saying trying to make it awkward for a minute why so keep talking you [ __ ] potheads I literally I'm stuck like this now because you know what I'm saying it's mad I buttered in you know what I'm saying because I was already fallen asleep you dozy bastards no joking you're talking about [ __ ] going and keeping and stuff and having wine yeah when you watch podcasts you originally think oh we just got to talk and talk
(33:27) you you should own [ __ ] you know what I'm saying it's your space we play games you know how that is how about no one talks for five minutes oh go ah yeah he talking their Lads that's what I know what's going on how many years mate would have confessed the police what you're doing okay we're getting car back all right we're not driving okay tell me when to stop alcohol can we stop stop okay you're having that one don't pop it yet oh that was a [ __ ] don't pop it Natalie tell me stop
(34:10) because it's gonna be in this hand whatever one you want stop that's you okay don't pop it how many Stop Money Stop go and the count of three we're all gonna pop it only one has stuff in and this is cool let's get a popping and if yours pops you gotta do the shot oh no okay okay face the camera the main middle one okay yeah three two one go who is it may always suck I couldn't pull mine I wasn't coming though what's going on it's amazing let's get it popping hey gun Scotty lad the sweet light to a
(34:55) drink with Scotty Cusco ESO mate and when we drink with Scotty he dances drinking eight seven six five four three two one well at least you're not driving me I thought he's bringing it back up he doesn't even drunk it mate you know what's funny you know what's funny there'll be girls watching this thinking that that is an ick a man that can't handle his shots no I've seen his ick on Tick Tock this girl is that right she wants squats not sure yeah he thought I said it was squats
(35:35) today yeah that's a good old Hornady but yeah I've seen this girls she said one of her biggest icks in life is okay she's driving in a car of her boyfriend he crashes he goes through the windscreen and he's literally crawling around on the floor wincing for air she says that's her biggest ick so she said the boy and he does that it's no nice well he's dying yeah just he's crawling around he's gone for the windscreen he's going on she said that's her biggest dick but
(36:05) like you have to experience an ink to happen yeah but maybe she just like you know yeah boyfriend go out the window it could be something that she's into you know she's [ __ ] given a little gag because she said it's an ick yeah but he should be doing the bedroom she's like like choking them out and then when they're out gasping forever that's an ick she wouldn't want yeah but that's how she knows that's how she knows it's not like she's been in a crash and her boyfriend's gone through the windscreen
(36:28) and he's cool you don't have to experience it to have one you just know what's going to make you cringe but that's such a random meaning on that one you've got to experience those are you because you're [ __ ] we fixed the proper game I'm drunky no do you know what it was gonna be you got the forfeits for this we're gonna be I said I'll explain at the end but you want to hear a little something funny yeah I love it now I'm feeling a bit juicy it's always funny yeah I am a failed rapper
(37:06) I could just say rapper I don't think I've ever heard you rap yeah I [ __ ] duck drop so many rap songs I've been living fast I've been living dangerous no I've been I've been doing right yeah so he's got the song the Soldier Boys what is okay we're all gonna take it in turns now you have to recite your favorite song of yours no not obviously go [ __ ] yourself because actually your your songs are actually fine get it right now let's go on there that's my goproof well Singapore oh this is about the
(37:49) drinky drinky I don't know if I could perform it not just before Scotty goes on okay if you're watching this pod and you've not hit subscribe you're having bad luck for the rest of your life so [ __ ] hit subscribe now to the world shares podcast yeah anyway crack on score if you don't go [ __ ] subscribe and go [ __ ] yourself yeah I said you're gonna bad luck forever now Scotty rap or sing it needs to be one verse in Hook just another day trying to get it right now I feel like I need to get it right
(38:22) now working every day in single night now I'm just trying to get it on my light now [Applause] [Music] you might want to get that Micron at your ear blame Johnny he broke the [ __ ] podcast yeah that's cool there the worst place possible there we go I think we got it yeah they told it mate uncomfortable yeah just hold like as a fat dick yeah but it's like there's only certain no hold it down as much touch then come back a bit yeah just hold there maybe that's a bit high should it down anyway recite your favorite song my neck
(39:45) hurts go mate I'm [ __ ] I don't think she knows me go on you got not my song just a song I don't have one gone come on you can sing a song I'm singing everyone's got to sing a Hamby song we just said I'm of your failed rapper I've just [ __ ] get it right now money money man the money go ahead that's fine Jordan you guys do you know do you know what is probably the best one that I've heard him do and it's actually when we're in the car together and it was actually funny as
(40:17) [ __ ] remember we're cruising in the white BMW you're in the back I'm in the front and he got and he got [ __ ] put a little tune on the villagusa villa villa of course now remember it's like I'm feeling like a villain and it was like uh hit my phone I better be about money you're bitching my beans because you think something funny and everybody knows the kids I [ __ ] that [ __ ] like a little bunny or something a long time ago me and my brother Carl here hitchhiking down along and along some
(40:55) Road oh Natalie knows when all of a sudden there shined a shiny demon in the middle of the road and he said play the best song in the world zoom in or I'll eat your souls well me and Carl we looked at each other and we said okay and we played the first in the cane of our head just so happened to me the best song in the world it was the best song in the world looking into my eyes and it's easy to see when I walk away needless to say the Beast was stunned and whip crap with his whipping tail and the Beast was done
(41:42) he asked us huh be your angels and we said nay we are Batman foreign [Applause] [Music] and I want you yeah she's driving in a truck playing the piano on the back of it or whatever it
(42:47) is anyway [ __ ] that that's white chicks back to being kids yeah do you know when you were a kid yeah what do you wish you learn all done um like like on some serious [ __ ] like yeah I'm saying like I'm mine I'll stop now I wish when I was like four I got thrown into boxing bro hmm being a hard [ __ ] why are you a professional boxer professional oh [Laughter] pushed me to that [ __ ] hell wait it's a big question how can any of you ready yeah I don't know anything mate you could have been good make potentially
(43:30) football like you played badminton your ballasted I'll never forget yeah Johnny just got a brand new badminton racket okay it was like and what was the brand on it I think that's Charlton that was it Carl walking through the schoolmate and I remember someone pushed him me and him he was obviously my older brother at school I must have been year seven he was in the 11.
(43:49) and he had it out the the um the thing I don't know why you had it out and like one of the old kids knocked into him and his racket scraped off a portal cabin and I felt like do you know when you feel like that feeling when you're sad like do you know like you got memories at school that was one of the mate like and maybe you just literally you didn't say [ __ ] you just kept walking and maybe you're looking at your racket because it was scratched and it was your brand new badminton racket mate did you smack him no no no because last year seven it was
(44:12) one of the biggest [ __ ] that you should have called me and said let's get this faster tiny then me hello [Laughter] I think it's one's where you have a motion that my emotion oh 100 attachments too I've got one I remember it made me feel like oh man yeah I got one of you when you were crying and you went you went to go home across the school field tell me I think I think because you used to obviously get bullied and [ __ ] you can tell why but like he was going to go home and he was running across the field I think
(44:52) that's I don't know what was happening I think he got like [ __ ] you know like the grandpas and the knees and that a PE he used to get them loads for some reason so he's running across the pit um he's run across the football pitch and I obviously ran after him put my arm around him and was like you're not going home now come on you're better than that and I talked him out of it for 10 minutes and he was crying and [ __ ] always remember I can remember it right now on the cricket on the lokia school
(45:14) on the cricket you know that the cricket pitch thing yeah we were on there and he was like I'm [ __ ] going home [ __ ] fill up with this [ __ ] I was like you're not I thought tomorrow but 10 minutes came back everyone chilled out always remember I remember at school it was crazy I feel like I used to never like jumping I never used to I used to punch balls and cry I walk home I got one for you first day of Rocky at school so the year above me remember do you remember eating obviously you know yeah we're
(45:37) like we're good mates now but yeah we'd had a fight like before Glory you've got this in Catherine's Woods we're rolling around the mud I'm shocked I've just picked up a load of mud shoved it in his face and then and then it got split up and he was I'll get you tomorrow on your induction day so I remember being in the back of like the old Rocky at school I'm on my own like I don't really know anyone and uh next thing I get [ __ ] beat up by about four or five kids from
(45:58) the year above me he is there just pounding me like my first day it wasn't even I wasn't even at Secondary School it was my induction days how close is school though but now me and Ian you know what I mean like well good meats oh yeah yeah school is honestly I think I said it to you the other day I think we drove past like a primary school they don't even realize like how the generation that they're in or what they're experiencing is like probably the best that they're gonna ever get do you know what I'm
(46:28) saying what's going on can you hear that I think it's time to pull the Short Straw segment time [Music] Scott's getting ready so yeah comment on this video comment this video if you like the segments you know what I'm saying because it's like I think it makes it fun I don't chew stuff for us no no because it's just because like we don't get any comments on our probably gonna make [ __ ] up no questions yet from the audience see Yo okay I've got a box here I've made it before we played it's quite
(47:13) wrong so you can't see inside okay because I made it I will be the last person to take a straw you're getting ready for it to Scott why am I always going no you pick you get the best chance mate you get to [ __ ] yeah I'm not getting four to one man yeah take one take one put a straw pink quickly free I don't know if you don't pick it free pool yeah [Laughter] [Applause] oh my God I'll do a show with you okay well I'm steaming already sure [Laughter] now lucky I'm massive
(48:20) absorbits all that muscles [ __ ] do you want to do one [ __ ] it can we all just do one no I'm driving I'm not driving [ __ ] it well Johnny can do one by the way this is just like four four three guys and a lady just getting steaming on the podcast oh this is the garage we'll do these you do this um a sniff of salts should we call it should we do something bad a sniff assault and bang this oh that'd be that would be trying to kill me and I can watch yeah [ __ ] it let's do it as mad as it sounds this is the first
(49:12) pod where I feel like this is the perfect level we want to be yeah Carnage having fun it's just like obviously like I'm chilling yeah yeah yeah yeah you're definitely chilling are we doing it with this one yeah [Laughter] this was a force how about we all do it together I'll stay here and you come around here okay guys God come on of course me and Scotty ain't doing a sniff without you nosy bastard you think I'm stupid enough to smell that so after last time I sniffed it you got something
(50:07) else coming like [ __ ] oh my [ __ ] [ __ ] nosy bastard it it really is Sean Kingston asking me to pay for his [ __ ] now's funeral yeah that's the oldest trick in the book club yeah trick this is Sean Kingston yeah that's a real brother right there you know what I mean Scott's [ __ ] on a roll now he's just licking he's literally just letting them roll back nothing I think you do another one just being a dick oh oh that was cheeky okay that one made my [ __ ] wet my foreskin just went Wet so
(50:57) that's me that's me Short Straw and the popper there's any more surprises right um nah yeah I've got I've just something just like I don't know why it's coming to my head I already got another [ __ ] [ __ ] story actually I'm flipping from my phone the other night and did you realize more aimed at the voice of the new Natalie that only 18 of women in the world can actually orgasm for penetration did you know that yeah I knew that and then I was looking at I was thinking [ __ ] I must be good and bad
(51:26) because I make [ __ ] 90 of them yeah every bird you've had is it and said [ __ ] me your brothers never made me orgasm but now if Johnny was a real fan what was the Pod last week he would have seen me spoke about this yeah exactly how to watch the clips I'm sitting here again that's the one I'm in yeah you watched it but no that's mad did you know what else to understand apparently like 60 of men are circumcised yeah they're [ __ ] doogies yeah yeah because honestly I [ __ ] I'm the only [ __ ] that prepares for the pod
(52:02) now I said these [ __ ] wake up don't do [ __ ] no I do because I said like but you just don't need to yeah you don't need to we don't actually I feel like we don't even need to prepare yeah I just prepare just in case just in case I'll be honest with you this is the most Shield I've been on the Pod I don't know if it's the Doogie yeah but I think it's because I'm just going with the flow yeah yeah yeah yeah I mean sometimes you just have to you know I mean like you say like this podcast this
(52:31) is like this is us this is real yeah like you know it's not scripted there's nothing that we're like you know reading for reading it's a sort so strong aren't they say and if it's being natural and you just gotta you know Embrace what you who you're with what comes into conversation you can't really plan stuff it's like to know when you have a bird you can't get hard on you're not going to stop with the bird you're gonna think [ __ ] it I'm gonna go to the floor and wait that's
(52:54) hoping it's back yeah and then it doesn't get fat so you can't go the phone yeah stop the phone you gotta run pack your bags mate just run you're a week straight never go back home another question for you boys as we're all getting older you know we're almost 30 now you know I'm again have you ever been with like Bud you know and you know you haven't you haven't got a problem you know your dick works but sometimes it just doesn't want to work for the life of you you're
(53:22) trying to get hard you're there just playing with them you're trying to beat it off while they're watching you like [ __ ] me get [ __ ] hard what the [ __ ] are you doing I mean you know what that is a few times I think I know what it is it's just because you think about it too much yeah you think about it it plays neurologically like or maybe you've got like as mad as it sounds I think you go you go like I've had I know for a fact that's one of the things in my head it lasts about a month mate because the
(53:49) first time and then before you even do it you're [ __ ] I better get a [ __ ] and you're overthinking it mate sometimes you just gotta [ __ ] make excuses man oh in the moment you gotta pretend I've ever pretended once I [ __ ] felt on my dick oh my god I've fallen on my [ __ ] swear on my life mate I'll say the name of it I've had kind of fell on my [ __ ] and I'm on the floor oh no did you fall on it made it up obviously faked it yeah how would anyone believe that because he fell off the bed
(54:12) I was I remember beating the [ __ ] out on the front of Emma she must have been thinking you're a [ __ ] weirdo I'm just slapping it why ain't you working in front of us she's honestly getting annoyed like oh my God I know he's older than me but [ __ ] me this thing's got a ring of dingling like it has the ring my dingling at some point and this [ __ ] [ __ ] thing's just flopping not working and that lasted maybe two three months that's crazy and I told you about it and I'm like I don't know what's
(54:35) going on and you know what I thought it was I thought I [ __ ] my back up on a video that we had done and I thought maybe the fact that my damage to my back you know it's everything's all connected down there and like that can affect oh really you getting you know getting the flag up the pole like you know what to do mate Viagra this is direct I'm looking at your eyes yeah okay have you ever been in love have I ever been in love all right if I have answered no I'm talking hey I'm saying have you ever I know for a fact
(55:05) she has one time Big Time Johnny one time just remember like every time I know that he's definitely was that time okay no I I have I have yeah yeah what do you mean you have are you still a joke the question the question was have you been in love yeah I've been in love like doesn't mean that's not saying I'm not in love now yeah yeah I know you're trying my mouth you're trying to twist the question I know what's going to happen I'm asking everyone yeah I think like I think you know you know
(55:43) Kristen's on the hype when his veins is popping out as well [Applause] [Laughter] [Music] and I was like [ __ ] it these shoes look hard but they shut up I'm gonna watch I think I look sick but I'm forgetting what's on my face Scott have you been in love yeah what's love feel like oh it's like a warm Buzzy you know what he's had too
(56:48) many drinks oh yeah [Laughter] [Music] [Laughter] that's right that's a great way yeah to experience describe love for sure Johnny just [ __ ] up I didn't say I wasn't asked [Music] because I've gone through that absolute psychotic phase where the jealousy the [ __ ] that's how I knew because it was like that's happened eh hey that happens to everyone yeah that's when I was caught I think that goes I think it's
(57:52) different I think men and women go through different things wait a minute there's three of us here let's ask him the question have you been in love boy oh boy I'm in love as we speak I know what I'm gonna say yeah I know what you're saying don't say it mate Jasmine is the most beautiful person that's ever come my life yeah you know what I'm saying like you know what I'm saying I'll die for her lovely no I'm saying I am in love I even said names none of you said names whose ass
(58:22) are you licking right now no one I'm just a changed man I'm a [ __ ] when I when we asked you that question I legit thought you're gonna say yeah I think he was he was going to say that but then no no no question clever I thought you're gonna say yeah no no just on some [ __ ] yeah I'm saying obviously obviously do you reckon you did I'll admit that you love her yeah and she's your girlfriend no she's she's my my team [Applause] when like the whole pregnancy thing
(59:48) going through it seeing him do that yeah even me I'm not gonna lie man she's the sickest mum ever yeah you know what I'm saying just seeing how like literally you're just like it's like yeah just make sure that it's like it makes you look at them entirely different ways before yeah because she's the mom of your child benefit as well she's such a good month to my child yeah exactly over four days many times you have your on and off stage everyone's just you know I'm saying you're just everyone has that
(1:00:15) though but it's like now it's like I don't know it's just the way I see him with Emmys just like nuts bro changes yeah because it's your kids and she's like she's your first man yeah I I know she's a good girl though as a best mate I can tell like she's good for you yeah she's a pro oh I should be sticking around then yeah but no that's always good like spreading rumors this has been a lit episode yeah I'm saying if you don't hit subscribe bad on forever we're gonna
(1:00:51) check out now because we're gonna go get dressed and go to the pub [Laughter] his haircut's got to his headline he's gonna go meet me all the old boys I swear to God yeah we're driving around this morning he's looking at all the old men with the same haircut saying oh he's lit he loves class should I get a selfie with him going out of town tomorrow again eight cells [Laughter] Paul's gone I can't move [Music] [Laughter] [ __ ] [Laughter]
(1:02:00) ing funny yeah Alex I think we should do like a bottle every session yeah 100 come on Alex can't show your face in the Pod and do a shot of us and this is how we're gonna see the point out please hit like drop a comment do you want to say here because I'm not doing mine ah there you are yeah all right for me we'll go listen to post Malone upstairs after waking shovel up yeah I actually I actually regret that he didn't do it yeah because I'm trying to think of it no no no you didn't yeah
(1:02:41) I didn't tickle your armpits because imagine where it went it could have been [ __ ] you know what I'm saying could I open a lot of doors actually it ends the week we do on a Friday it ends the week sick yeah we have fun you know what I'm saying get us to [ __ ] 10K sub by the end of the week and Johnny and Scott will do this if we get 10 000 subscribers on this channel by next pod will you do your hair if if I do it I'll do the opposite to you no no no no let's keep the top and the sides all good that's just the
(1:03:17) fade mate you [ __ ] dozy bastard on my mother's life if we get 10 000 Subs by next week I'm doing the same haircut as you you're pissed I'm just sick no that's facts because I yeah 100 and we'll do it on the Pod yeah sick Johnny yeah if we use 10 000 Subs on the channel we basically need to double our subscribers you get this right it's a lot it's about six I'm gonna be dumped juicing look at the camera Emma rang me you picked up and you said I think Johnny [ __ ] forgot
(1:03:44) scared yeah Johnny's [ __ ] got his Fanny out yeah yeah let's do it look at the camera say 10 000 subscribers and my hair is coming off like this mug here me and you brother yeah yeah hair grows if you've got a nice hairline [Applause] oh my God we're both [ __ ] yeah I know right Lads on that note right get that [ __ ] drink Daniel as soon as Alex come on come on Alex show them what you're about Look Natalie [ __ ] off hey let Alex get your seat to do it yeah [Laughter] [Laughter] oh [ __ ] I can't move
(1:04:59) [Music] [Laughter] [Laughter] stay still three two one [ __ ] me boys [ __ ] oh you didn't do it oh you just took my seat for that no light you have to do that listen guys that camera guy Alex on Instagram yeah mate we must look like drunks on this pod what the [ __ ] comment on the video okay everyone shut the [ __ ] up okay yep because you're talking too much mate I don't pay you to talk but yo comment the video if you want us to do drinking shots for the videos
(1:06:05) I'll be honest yeah actually this is the one that I've enjoyed the most because if we're just chilling out yeah it's a bit more you know what I mean like where everyone's just together um if you're bringing the shots in then the bong's got to come in here drop a like drop a comment subscribe and remember one ten thousand Subs next week they're both shaving their head like this I'm gonna do a made feed Instagram post Facebook post everything direct traffic there to make it happen that wasn't in the [ __ ]
(1:06:36) people just ten thousand Subs oh we need a new contract I think Scott oh yeah you don't need another contract you can't you're doing freebie jobs [Laughter] see that again [Music]